The boys revisit this season’s theme, posing another query into why baseball’s existential dilemma is its “slowness.” What does it mean for baseball to have slowed down because it has sped up? The compaction of dozens of new metrics into each moment has forced prolonged consideration of strategy, therefore resulting in slower “pace.” When does too much analysis dissolve one’s aesthetic appreciation? Abomination: football’s obsession with its preseason. It’s ten days out and commentators are already freaking out because not enough people are freaking out about not talking enough about football! LOL are you kidding us? Football is stupid.